Escape Pod 579: Texts from the Ghost War


Texts from the Ghost War

By Alex Yuschik

While I realize driving that mech likely takes all of your limited resources, please take care not to step on the roses.

what

Don’t step on the roses. I don’t care if we’re under imminent attack.

Your mech is standing so close to them I’m cringing.

who is this?

I can see you typing and then stopping

don’t waste my time coming up with a lie, punk

Who I am or how I got your number is irrelevant.

no, it’s not

and, fyi, we don’t drive them, we pilot

gods, you’re probably chung sol trolling me

I assure you, I am not.

I am only here for the roses.

excuse me, I have to go talk with my squadmates now

find out which asshole is pranking me today oh joy

That must be challenging.

kid, you don’t even know

As all you fox pilots are assholes.

hey

look

chung sol, this you? if so

kindly expect four shits in your main turbine tomorrow

you know I’m on overtime

Heavens, now you’re endangering the topiaries.

Why are you pacing in that thing?

Stop.

how dare you care about less about me than topiaries, chung sol

what about our unit oath huh

I’m hurt

And I’m not Chung Sol.

then who are you

who else could be such a shit to me

knowing what week it is

I requested your number from the butler.

I asked for the mech labeled with a five who kept threatening my roses.

You can call me Hyeon.

I

What? If you don’t like it when I take time to type a response then don’t the same thing.

I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tear up our grounds. That’s all.

Did you fall asleep in that cockpit?

Or are you ignoring me?

I keep this up as long as you like. I’ve been told I’m terribly persistent.

Seven Sparrows Sleeping Hyeon-jin, I humbly apologize for my uncouth address. If I’d known I was texting a member of S3 I would have behaved with all the courtesy and respect you are due.

Don’t call it S3, it’s my House name.

I understand I am in no position to make requests, but please don’t allow my thoughtless actions to reflect poorly on my Nine.

They are excellent officers, all of them.

Especially Chung Sol.

Stop.

We’re expecting a breach soon but I’ll report for disciplinary action as soon as my shift’s done.

S

T

O

P

Hells, how do you type so fast?

Is that how they choose you for drivers, pilots, or whatever? Finger speed?

As pleased as I am that the House of Seven Sparrows Sleeping still carries the appropriate weight, I’m not my older sister. A secondborn son can’t fire you.

But I would like you to be mindful of the flowers.

Sir. I must apologize again.

You’re right, it is odd using formal language after that sterling interlude about defecating in turbines.

We’re about the same age, so let’s be casual.

And you can still pace in the machine, Five. Just do it at a healthy distance from the gardens.

Yes, Hyeon-jin.

Casual, I said.

I mean

yes


Five, are you there? It’s Hyeon.

I’m trapped at a goodwill dinner and I crave entertainment.

Unfortunately for you, you are the one person in my recent messages least likely to employ this as blackmail, so you get to amuse me.

As you’re resolutely not responding, shall I tell you about the party?

Very well.

The ceiling is hung with chrysanthemums and paper tigers edged in gold. Typical Eun Hwa. You don’t know her, but she’s angling for contracts. The only way I can avoid talking with her is to pretend I’m texting someone of extreme importance.

I may have to call you to keep up the charade. Please prepare yourself.

The wine is good. Too spiced for my tastes—oh hold on

There’s a commotion by the tables.

Ah.

Someone wrote the guests’ names on the place settings in oxblood and a senator fainted.

What superstitious idiots. I sign my name in red all the time.

why are you doing this

He lives.

What are you up to this evening?

it doesn’t matter

with all due respect, I’m not on the clock

I am not getting paid to do what you want

not at the moment, anyway

and I would prefer to go back to what I was doing

Well, unfortunately for both of us, I’m stuck at this party.

I don’t want to be flirted with and you are my out.

I’m no aristocrat’s plaything, hyeon

The House would not appreciate you calling its heir by his first name.

am I

speaking with the house

may I

ask the house to take its heir’s phone away

No, of course not.

I am a joy to text.

Beguile me, Five. Are you fighting ghosts again?

you know

I really hate when people call it that

fighting ghosts

look, I don’t have time for you

I need to repair the refrigerant tubing

Am I less interesting than refrigerant?

yes

thank you for saving me the trouble of breaking it to you politely

Tell me something.

will you leave me alone if I do

You have my word of honor.

It can be anything. Tell me how your day was.

I just need text I can scroll through and look serious reading whenever Eun Hwa comes around.

Preferably a sizeable amount, though anything of substance will do.

fine

you want to know how my day was?

today I had to explain

to a bereft grandmother why she can’t make her yearly offering to her deceased wife

and tonight I am very very carefully picking spectral teeth out of the vpx’s cooling tank

aka the VPX-Azure III, aka my machine

aka only the fastest, hardest-to-handle fox mech around, rich kid

because I bet you don’t even know what that is

I do so know.

today I evacuated a school, provided cover fire, rescued chung sol’s ass

and got my nine out alive as another district fell to the ghosts

and our sorry city grew sma ller and sorrier

today I almost got crushed by an underworld barricade as it went down

today I had to leave civilians as they begged me to save them

because we couldn’t risk losing another vpx

and tonight I am loading and unloading the bullets in the emergency sidearm

over and over

because only when I can do it without my hands shaking

am I going to be good to take these damn teeth out without poisoning myself

today I have had to commit several atrocities with the vpx’s gaseous gun

that would have gotten me beheaded for war crimes in better centuries

today I dishonored the dead

and today I am trying to explain

why I by turns

want you and don’t want you to know

precisely what it is I do

but most of all today they promised I’d have off work

and I didn’t

good

my hands are back to normal

enjoy your stupid party

I

I didn’t know.

the problem

with you people

is that you never think to ask


I have a question.

hyeon

it is four in the morning

and don’t even start about the name

wake me up at four and I get to call you anything I want

Do you have the volume up on your text alerts?

How primitive. I thought you’d at least know how to mute them.

I do

know how to mute them

I just can’t when I’m on call

Oh.

yeah, no kidding “oh”

Anyw ay, I realized I never asked your name.

What should I call you?

wow

what use is being

~the great scion of S3~

if you don’t even abuse all that power to snoop on my records

It’s more polite to ask.

And I’d imagine you don’t like being called Five.

I do, actually

like it

it’s better than my real name

five’s always on point in the nine when we do wedge formation

I engage the enemy first

react fastest to any crisis

you don’t pilot unit five unless you’re damn good

so call me five, I don’t mind

it just reminds me how great I am

You’re insufferable.

I’m not the one texting this late

just to ask someone their name

That’s not what I wanted to ask.

then what is your question

come on hyeon

at least try to type faster

repairing the vpx was a lot of work and I’m sleepy

What was it about this week that you needed off?

?

I reread our texts after the party.

And I am trying

to know what to ask.

oh

it doesn’t matter

sorry, you know, for before

It’s fine.

it’s just, this was supposed to be my mourning week

but predicted breaches looked so bad all fox pilots got put on call

despite the fact that I applied for my week months in advance

did proper mourning training and everything

How vulgar. You don’t need to be taught how to mourn.

you need to be briefed on how to do it safely, though

or else, you know

breach

Mourning that way’s not the same.

To keep your sadness within prescribed bounds of error, what a joke.

Grief shouldn’t be safe.

well

you’re right, grief is a weapon

and the ghosts have too many weapons already

for me to hand them another

did you know I can refuse to go into an op zone

if I think it’s too dangerous?

sometimes it’s better to let the ghosts win

and I don’t want to risk my ass saving people

who are that desperate to die

You talk about mourning like it’s a liability.

When our mother died, we had all the safety procedures carried out. Someone stayed with Ji Hae and me at all times to make sure we didn’t summon her ghost.

They carted our mother’s urn off to a skyscraper ossuary as soon as we lit the last stick of incense, a nd then told us we had to secure permits if we wanted to visit, like juveniles.

you lost a parent, hyeon

that’s pretty big on the ghost scale

people have burned out whole city blocks with longing

when it comes to that kind of absence

You’re one to talk.

You have to have deep-seated issues with the afterlife to punch ghosts.

I have the necessary affinity with the machine

that’s all

and hey at least they approved me for a mourning week

That they never let you have.

yeah

but that’s also pretty normal

when’s the death anniversary for your mother?

I don’t want to talk about it.

okay

But…

Who were you going to mourn for?

In your week.

oh, the usual

my story’s more or less like everyone else’s

whose family was in a gateway district when it happened

Ah. I’m sorry.

it’s okay

lots of things vanish quickly these days

and of all the ways to go

that was probably the kindest

All the same, my sympathy.

I hope you got those teeth out all right.

I did

thanks


Fifve

Figf

5

are you okay?

Oh no

oh yes

haha oh dear

strongly hoping this is not going to be what I think it’s going to be

Funnt thing, I’m stuck.. the patry went too long and we went to a roofstop

Rooftop bar, to haggle and such, not really haggle but something like it you know

But

but what

but the afterparty’s done.

I need to go home and cannot be seen in this condition.

wow that’s really too bad

My older sister has marriage candidates staying at our house. For the business. For me. You probably think that’s barbaric.

But this is my life and they’re all awful here please come get me

wait wait

what

what are you asking me

I can’t hail a cab like this, not with curfew and the ghosts, everyone’s going to ask questions and please I just need to get home without ji hae noticing she will get so mad five so mad

five please

you are asking a member of our glorious defense force

to quit his sleep, which is vital to his health

health which is directly related to his ability to pilot a vpx

to come save you from the mess you deserve to be in

five I’m so dizzy so tire

I can’t believe you

hey hyeon

hyeon

Yes?

what’s the club

Thousand Myriad Mysteries

no no wait, that was the one before this one.

White Rabbit Black Rabbit

that’s it

how many clubs did you go to?

don’t remember after the fourth

wow okay partyboy

look, go find a bouncer

have them take you to the door in fifteen

callsign’s Nine Crowns Nine Stars if they ask

What?

just show your phone to the bouncer, they’ll know what to do


Well.

I suppose I have you to thank for this disgusting and lukewarm can of tea on my bedside table.

And, judging by the relative calm in which I awoke, also for getting me back without my sister noticing.

good morning to you too

I apologize for my texts last night.

Rest easy that I have spent the requisite half hour being mortified.

Truthfully

I didn’t think you’d come.

I remember watching the raid lights and listening for sirens because I thought on the off-chance you did, it would be in your VPX and I’d be squashed into the cockpit with you.

But you carried me.

well

more like gave you the world’s longest piggyback ride in a blackout zone

but that’s splitting hairs

I may be better off not knowing, but…

Did I say anything untoward?

oh

I don’t think so

well, maybe

Five.

drunk you was very flattering!

I feel a second wave of mortification coming on.

no, no, you said several flattering things

and I was very flattered

that was it

did you drink the tea, though

Did you do something to it?

no, just figured you’d be thirsty when you woke up

Oh.

Yes, I did. Thanks.

I don’t think I would have responded if I’d gotten texts like that.

As much as it pains me to admit, I owe you.

then tell me about the roses

you kept talking about them when I was carrying you

in the spirit of full disclosure, you were also singing

I don’t know if anyone’s told you

but you have surprisingly good range

and

you told me why you write your name in red

I don’t believe in lying to myself about things like that. That’s all.

I was foolish and drunk. If it upsets you, then forget it.

it doesn’t, it just felt personal

It is.

But I don’t mind you knowing.

anyway, that’s all that happened

I’m glad you’re feeling better

The roses.

If you’re still curious

They were my mother’s.

ah

sorry

You have nothing to apologize for.

You didn’t step on them.


what gala is it tonight?

I can see the lights from here

Mine.

The last charity affair this season from our company, held at our home.

My sister is rather pleased with the scale.

Naturally, I had to rope off the roses to insure all these tipsy idiots don’t rip them up making romantic gestures.

They are quite beautiful in the lanternlight, though. I’ll send a picture.

Anyway, grand though it may be, we are hosting a philanthropic event. There’s an orphanage coming and several other charities.

yeah, I heard from some retired friends

a representative from pilot rehab is there

thanks

?

I haven’t done anything charitable yet.

just, it’s good

when I started you were lucky to make it back alive

if you banished a ghost related to someone powerful, well

once you got too wrecked to pilot anymore

you sort of knew what was going to happen to you

now it’s less bad

I’d like to think we’re all just trapped in unfortunate circumstances.

We could all leap into the main rift and let the spirits of our ancestors devour us, let this place truly become a ghost city, but we don’t. We despair, but we are always ruthless in our hope.

giving up’s not really an option for most people

It’s more an option than you think.

Ji Hae’s calling me. I’ve got to go be a good host.

too busy being important, I see, I see

well, have fun

meanwhile, I’ll just be sitting here in the vpx

this is one of my favorite parts

the rush when you get the call, foxes sprinting on all cylinders

gyroscopes whining you back to stability when you take a turn too fast

dispatching rogue gods turned into monsters

when I was a little kid, we didn’t have mechs

we just had dramas with people in boxy costumes

cheap effects, extreme campiness, the whole deal

I used to dream about stomping through the city in a giant robot

thankfully I’m much better at maneuvering than I was in my dreams, haha

in the dramas pilots always crashed into trash cans and

oops there’s central command time to go

You’re on call? Tonight?

Hells—Five, stay away from here. If you’re ordered to come here, refuse.

These idiots stole an urn.

They’re saying they’ve made it into a wraith bomb and planted it below the house.

They’re making a political statement, ghosting High Houses.

We were on the news before but now we’re on as hostages.

Everyone’s calling home or emergency lines or screaming and I

I don’t think it’s worth the risk to save us.

I may not have studied ghastly weapons like you have, but I know enough about these devices to understand you don’t just diffuse them.

hyeon, terrible timing

Use the authority of Seven Sparrows to refuse.

I give you my permission.

As far as redemptive last acts go that’s not a bad one, I think.

can’t talk rn, with 9

I can pick you out on the screens, Five.

I know what your VPX looks like.

Well.

That was a very tidy rout.

thank

But there’s still the small matter of the bomb.

You need to get clear of the blast radius.

You can’t get it to a fallen district in time, so leave.

Five

Five

What in all the hells are you doing

sorry

Put it down.

I don’t care who’s ordering you, I guarantee you I am higher up the food chain

put that damn urn down and get out

or get someone else to do this.

can’t

fastest

You idiot, if you’re still holding it when it goes off

Five? Are you there?

There was a bright light from all the news screens

We couldn’t see anything

What happened?

Are you okay?

They’re bringing paramedics to us now.

I don’t know where you are. The networks keep showing you leaping the border between ghost territory and ours, and then exploding like a second dawn.

Everyone here is cheering, like this was all just an entertainment.

Why aren’t you responding?

I don’t appreciate this suspense.

If you’re dead I

I’ve stolen a team of paramedics

If you can still see this, hold on


I’m just leaving you this message in case you wake up while I’m gone.

You’ll be pleased to know that I have already yelled at six people on your behalf: two doctors, three nurses, and one person whom I assume was Chung Sol. I look forward to more.

Actually, I didn’t mean to yell at Chung Sol, but he was too loud. Everyone else was an idiot. Rest assured you are (finally) being afforded the best of possible care.

All the guests made it out safely thanks to you, though my house is now ghost territory. You shouldn’t worry—I took all that was important with me before I left.

A nurse said there was a vending machine on the third floor, so that’s where I’m going. I felt like the general mood of your coma might be improved by the sight of a familiar can of tea.

I think you like matcha.

Or maybe you don’t, maybe you hate it and think it’s gross, because that’s what you left for me to choke through when I was hungover.

Either way, I hope it will provide comfort.

My sister is cross, but when we last spoke I had the pleasure of unleashing several colorful phrases borrowed from you.

I will not repeat them here, though if you wake up I could be persuaded to reenact our exchange. I don’t believe you are allowed to eat solid food for a while, but as you are unconscious you don’t seem to mind.

I read your name, on your bed.

It was odd seeing it there. Your family name, then your given name. It’s stupid but I keep expecting it to be Five.

I don’t know why I am telling you this

But I have been standing here in front of the vending machine

with my forehead pressed to the glass

for ten minutes now

I have

forgotten how to use it

All the gods and hells, I wish this let you delete texts. What a useless messaging program.

Anyway, I am not so much an idiot as to be defeated by a vending machine. I’m coming back with drinks.

And yes, I do intend to text you through your coma.

If I make you incur an overcharge feel free to forward the bill to Seven Sparrows Sleeping.

hyeon

why is there a 5

scribbled over my name

on my bed chart

Five

Stop texting

Relax or something

Gods

and I can’t believe it

I’ll be right there

you brought me roses

About the Author

Alex Yuschik

Alex Yuschik is a PhD candidate in Mathematics at the University of Pittsburgh studying set theoretic topology. Aside from math and writing, Alex likes ghosts, burritos, and video games, which when all put together sounds like a pretty great party. Alex is also the proud owner of a Shiba Inu named Kebab.

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About the Narrators

Trendane Sparks

narrator Trendane Sparks
As a mascot performer, one is often seen and not heard. As a voice actor, one is often heard and not seen. At some point, the universe will balance out. Living in the San Francisco Bay Area, Tren usually records at night when things are the most quiet and edits during the day. You can imagine what that does to one’s sleep schedule! But, BattleTech and Shadowrun audiobooks aren’t going to narrate themselves…yet.

Find more by Trendane Sparks

narrator Trendane Sparks
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Adam Pracht

Adam Pracht lives in Kansas, but asks that you not hold that against him.

His full-time day job is as Marketing and Volume Purchasing Program Coordinator for Smoky Hill Education Service Center in Salina, continuing his career of putting his talents to work in support of education.

He was the 2002 college recipient of the Robert F. Kennedy award for writing about the disadvantaged and has published a disappointingly slim volume of short stories called “Frame Story: Seven Stories of Sci-Fi & Fantasy, Horror & Humor” which is available from Amazon as an e-Book or in paperback. He’s been working on his second volume – “Schrödinger’s Zombie: Seven Weird and Wonderful Tales of the Undead” – since 2012 and successfully finished the first story. He hopes to complete it before he’s cremated and takes up permanent residence in an urn.

You can also hear his narration and audio production work on two mediocre Audible audiobooks, and as a regular producer and occasional narrator for The Drabblecast.

Find more by Adam Pracht

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